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A $35,000 Canadian fever dream where porn stars fight paper-mache bugs. Unforgettable garbage.
TMDB
40
IMDb
29
Rotten Tomatoes
22
Google
57
Watch(US)

Things (1989)

DIY chaosso-bad-it's-artCanuxploitation nightmare

Overview

Horror

An impotent husband with a fanatical desire to father children, forces his wife to undergo a dangerous experiment. This results in the birth of a multitude of monstrous THINGS.

Flag of CACA
Content warning
monstergoreexperimentgiant insectpregnancychainsawparasitecanuxploitationporn starfemale reporter
masculine inadequacybodily horrorscientific hubrisfertility anxiety

Standout Aspects

Practical Effects

Giant bugs that look like piñatas stuffed with ham.

Sound

Dubbed dialogue recorded in what sounds like a bathroom.

Best for:Friends: Drunk group roasting required — this demands witnesses.·Rewatch: Multiple viewings to catch which scenes make zero sense.
Heads up:Gore: Amateur-hour blood effects and insect birth scenes.·Sexual Content: Adult film star casting with awkward non-sexual roles.
Andrew Jordan

Director

Andrew Jordan

ReleasedSep 1, 1989
Runtime1h 24m
StatusReleased

Vibe

Pacefast
Intensityhigh
Tonedark
Feellight
Budget$35K
Left Field Productions

Top Cast

Amber Lynn

Amber Lynn

Reporter

Barry J. Gillis

Barry J. Gillis

Don Drake

Ask about Things

Opens AI chat

Deep Dive

Trivia, insights & behind the scenes

Trivia

Shot in Scarborough, Ontario over 1987-88 with equipment borrowed from a local cable station. The $35,000 budget mostly went to film stock.

Cultural

Amber Lynn's casting was a deliberate marketing hook — her entire mainstream film career consists of this and 'Evil Toons.' The 'Canuxploitation' label was retroactively applied by cult film historians documenting Canada's wild straight-to-video era.

YouTube

Things trailer

Things trailer

Gallery

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